Anniversary of Your Death

February 26, 2024

Dear Mitch,

Today has been a difficult day.

It is the anniversary of your death. The time has gone by at a turtle’s pace and lightening speed, all at the same time. How can it be that I have woken up and gotten out of bed, even for a short while, for 365 days?

In some ways,

this day is like any other day of grieving for you. Immense sadness, loneliness, desperation, and tears. I feel like I haven’t felt the sun on my face since you were diagnosed with cancer. That doesn’t mean I haven’t been outside; I have, as that is one place I feel your presence, but to feel the sun as a warm embrace has been lost on me.

Laura Ellen, our niece, is one amazing woman!

She nourished you all through your cancer, making sure she found nutritious meals. She listened closely as we relayed information about what the doctor told us so she could ensure she was making what YOU needed.

Today, she made the one dish that was your favorite. Laura Ellen would make it after your treatments in Fargo. She had a picture of you as part of the table setting, drinks to raise a glass to you in your honor, and the aromatic, restorative roast. As we ate, we reminisced about our favorite memories of you with tears in our eyes. The supper felt intimate and sacred. With a shared sense of grief all around us, we were safe from the storms raging outside and in our hearts. The knowledge that time is precious. You just don’t know how much time you have left on this earth.

Laura Ellen knew just what I needed on this heartbreaking day.

Mitch, you KNEW I would have these wonderful people in my life. Because of this, you understood you could go to heaven without worrying.

I will love you til MY dying day!


Did this letter resonate with you? I would love to hear about it! 

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  1. Yes, dear Nicole it certainly resonated with me as I sit here crying my eyes out. Big hugs to you, I would love to do a Samantha on Bewitched wiggle my nose and make it all ok. Just know we love you and are thinking of you and your family. You write so beautifully and share your love story so unselfishly. Thank you! ❤️

    1. Marianne,
      Yes, I would love to be Samantha too. Wiggle my nose so no one ever has to deal with cancer or heartbreak again.

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